can we make a difference?

In a couple of days I would be leaving for Bangalore. Hopefully the boring life which I have been facing for the last some months will come to an end and I will get busy and find a new meaning of life. During the last some days I have been doing a lot of thinking-some good and some bad but mostly revolving around the surroundings which affect me.

Things like illiteracy and poverty have been haunting me. Some days back I went with my parents for shopping. I picked up 4 moustache jeans and wanted to buy all of them because each one of them had a new look. But my mom settled for only 2 jeans citing the reason that my waist is never constant and I already had many jeans. I was very angry at her-so angry that I refused to have dinner and headed straight for home. On the way our car stopped at a traffic signal and I saw a semi naked child banging his hand at the window pane. His body was soaked with dirt and there were tears in his eyes. I turned my gaze so that the kid goes away- but the signal turned green and the car moved. I remembered the incident again when I wore one of the jeans the next day. Here I was who refused dinner because I was ‘angry’ with my mom and there was that boy who had to run in the middle of the road, semi clad, with the hope that someone will give him a rupee with which he can eat something. Here I was who wanted jeans because they had something new in them despite of having loads of other clothes and there was that kid who would consider himself lucky if he found something to wear. I felt guilty of myself. Why does such disparity occur. I have no might of my own- I am what I am because of my parents. I don’t contribute anything in the fact that I lead a good life and yet I have the audacity to turn my gaze away from that boy.. and yet I have the courage to tell people whom I see begging to earn and live a good life when I myself am so lazy that I just go about ordering things around….

We have it in us to lecture people but not once do we think that what if we were in their place. I am not telling that I believe in giving alms to anyone and everyone who asks for it, but it at least gives my brain a racking. Can I do something to help these people? And I get the answer as a big NO. I can’t do it alone. I still don’t know know what’s gonna happen to my future then how can I think of others. I have plans to set up an NGO but it’s just that- a plan. What the hell am I doing right now. I am frustrated. I am angry at myself.

What I propose that some of us unite and do something. A few days back I gave some of my friends a treat because I was leaving Calcutta. Absurd.. now it will sound so but I never thought twice before giving the party. I feel guilty now. I am not saying just give the money to the poor but we can at least help in setting a small shop or something for them. It’s just a thought but I am sure if we unite we can help them. I have never done anything like this before and I don’t know if I will be able to do so. But I will try and make a difference. A thing started is half done and I promise that I will try and start things around while I am still studying. I know I will do something in the future but why wait for the future?

what's the modern gandhigiri?

Most of us would have seen the movie “ lage raho munnabhai”.

It’s a wonderful movie touching upon some important aspects. During the movie the audience was clapping after every problem Munna solved with the help of his weapon of non-violence. There was this incidence when a neighbour used to spit at a person’s doorstep and he used to clean it everyday so that the person spitting feels guilty. Well this is a wonderful thought but how many of us would follow this path? We are angry even if a pinch of dirt falls on our doorstep and sitting at the movie hall we were clapping and thinking that next time we will follow this step. But how many of us have the courage to do that? How many of us are unashamed to do that? Well frankly speaking I can’t. I don’t have the courage but I at least had my thinking caps on instead of just clapping and forgetting the incidence. Many of us are just a bunch of cowards. We learn something but we are afraid to implement it. We know that spitting on the roads is bad but who cares..

Really it’s good that Mahatma Gandhi is not alive today, else it would have pained him much. We are not doing anything good neither are our politicians by going backwards rather than moving forward. I have read in history about people being forced to convert their religion but what’s being followed now is the conversion of a person who is truthful into a deceitful one. He is taught that if he follows the path of truth then that path will lead him nowhere and he will never be “successful” in life. Different people have different definitions of success. Some say success is money and power and some rare people say success lies in the heart. I believe that success is power and money but can’t power and money be achived by treading on the path of truth? It’s just a question without an answer because all of us fear that path.

I have never believed in non-violence as a strong weapon because I think we have moved much ahead in life and guilt is not something which everyone feels. The country is being plagued by blasts after blasts. I don’t know what’s the reason behind this. It’s really beyond my comprehension that how are people not guilty after taking so many innocent lives. How can I believe the Mahatma? How can I be sure that if I follow the path of non-violence the other person will feel guilty and give me whatever I want?

I am a teenager and just starting my life and I am utterly confused. What’s success after all. What’s inner self? Why is every individual so different from the rest? Why does everyone not think on the same line? Why can’t we live in peace? I am confused.. i am confused..
I don’t believe in astrology but my parents do and they take me to an astrologer and that man forces me to think about my future. Should I believe in the crap he says?
I went with my uncle to a government working place and see him handing over some money and taking a piece of paper. I ask him, “uncle what’s this” .He replies, “You will understand everything once you grow big” . I understand everything uncle.. I understand everything.

Why are we on this earth? We know that we have just one go at life and our life can end anytime but still we live as if we are never going to die. We gather huge amount of money to safeguard our ‘future’ . Are we here to deceit, to cheat, to lie, to kill, to find out ways like non-violence to tackle problems?

Why are we here..

I AM CONFUSED